Empty

Thats the word I've been looking for all day... Empty. I know I'm doing stuff and have a completely full and rewarding life...

But today

I feel empty. Like there is something I should be doing... Something useful, creative and that brings joy to me and everyone else.

I don't know what that is. I feel like I'm doing all the right things but still feel unfulfilled.

I am still fighting off a sickness... The symptoms are still there but arent bothering me too much, I feel so tired but can't sleep. My eyes hurt and won't focus...

I'm not really looking forward to all the good things in my world... I haven't been excited about anything in a very long time.

I was thinking maybe I should have a go at writing novels again... I've always wanted to try painting...

I want to read a good book or 3... Been meaning to take a trip down to the library.

I wish I knew what to do. I just want to feel fresh, new and happy. Thats all. I don't think spending money on things to help will cut it. It comes from inner peace, which clearly I don't have right now.

I know not to place my hopes on the move making any difference to how I feel. It may make some difference but I don't want to be disappointed. I have no future goals. I am living for each day and moment and its just not working for me.

So for now, I will try and relax and get to sleep. That's the goal for now